Flying Spaghetti Monster on My Desk (Shhhh… Let’s see if they notice.)

Posted on 28th January 2008 by Ryan Somma in Enlightenment Warrior - Tags: ,

A friend gave me this ultra-nifty handy-dandy spifferific crocheted FSM for the Winter Solstice Holiday Season, and since FSM is my co-pilot, I’ve placed it on my desk for all to appreciate.

FSM is My Co-Pilot
FSM is My Co-Pilot

Here’s the thing. I work for the Federal Government on a Coast Guard Base. We are prohibited from religious displays, so I’m officially breaking the rules. The people I work with are not allowed to hang up crosses, stars of davidzes, etc on their desks. This has come up before, and management asserts that it is a Federally-mandated no-no.

But here’s the other thing. Nobody knows what the heckskies FSM is, so they don’t know it’s religious. Dig?

But here’s another other thing! Even if they did know what it is, by asking me to take it down, they’d be acknowleding Pastafarianism as an actual religion! Thus derriding their own religion!!!

And here’s another other other thing!!! Pastafarianism isn’t really a religion, it’s a mockery of religion; therefore, the FSM on my desk is actually a symbol of secularism!!!

Bwa-Ha-Ha!!! Somebody call the Supreme Court in to figure this one out. I’m not afraid to face SCOTUS!!! First thing I’d do is kick Justice Scalia in the balls!!!

I have absolutely no idea if I’m breaking the Federal rules or not, and I’m chasing logical loopdeeloos around in my head trying to figure it out, and now I… I… I’m feeling kinda dizzy and seasick…

Okay… bye now.

Comments Off on Flying Spaghetti Monster on My Desk (Shhhh… Let’s see if they notice.)

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  1. My old boss at USPS always said “Halleluah” when things went good. It got old.

    Comment by Clint — January 28, 2008 @ 9:45 am

  2. I’m calling your boss and having your desk banished to the phantom zone. Say hi to Milton for me.


    Comment by BMF — January 28, 2008 @ 10:15 am

  3. I see your FSM display and raise you one Xenu display. If only I could find one somewhere.

    Comment by doranchak — January 28, 2008 @ 10:59 am

  4. Ryan, I had no idea you were also a Pastafarian! Don’t worry about SCOTUS…I have a strong rational feeling that any Supreme Court decision would soon be reversed as a direct result of Tampering by Noodly Appendage.



    Comment by flyingsirkus — January 29, 2008 @ 4:43 am

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